Death

Well I've had my share of deaths starting at an early age. I stop counting once it went pass 10 and I wasn't even a teenager yet. Most of you probably know I watched the Michael Jackson memorial. His death has effected me not because I was a huge fan or because he was famous, but because I'm sensitive to when people die even if I don't know them. I could also relate to him and his family on some things/issues. This is coming from someone who cries when the feed the children infomercials are playing and I just want to bring them all home with me.

I can relate on the level of losing a big brother as Janet Jackson did. I was also 11yrs like Paris Jackson when my big brother(who was 17) was murdered. I can remember it as if it was yesterday down to what occurred that whole day. We were far from famous but we had similar struggles growing up. Our situation was with our extended family and not the media. I've also had my fair share of media exposure (but that's another blog post). My extended family were very cruel to my small immediate family consisting of my Mom, two brothers, and myself. We were poor but rich at heart. Because we lived a simple, charitable, and humble life. My mom did not raise us to be greedy, money hungry, or materialistic. As I grew up I maintained the same attitude that I was raised with I can't say the same for my lil brother. The family had spreaded rumors about my big brother and no it did not involve any type of abuse. We were disowned by our entire family and treated like dirt up until the day my brother passed away(that's another blog post). It turned out to be a piss on you situation to them from us. My little family was know all over town/city to be good people especially my mom who had helped so many people.

After my brother death we found out that my brother was baptized a couple months before he was murdered. So we had the service at his church. The church was huge not only was every seat filled, but some had to stand for the service. Our extended family attended the funeral and keep asking who all these people were and how did they know us I just looked at them thinking "who are you should be the question?" It was beautiful to have everyone who know us be to there along with people who had never met us but were effected by our family in a positive way some how and wanted to share that time with us. As I watch the casket being driven it was like my brother funeral, but I was in the car behind the Hearst. I was glad to be watching on the outside this time. Sitting in the front row for this type of service is no fun. A month from today will be the anniversary of my brother death Aug 8th.

I took yesterday off to watch the memorial and had a scheduled appt for myself immediately afterwards to pamper myself at the Spa where I spent about 5hrs. I was so relaxed afterwards. Every now and then we all just need to be pampered :)

If

theres a group of people out there that expect their mate to change so that their goals align with the others'

theres another group of people that do not wish for their mate to change at all and of course they do and simply respond with 'people change'

i have found myself in both of these groups with the lack of understanding that change is inevitable but we dont always recognize it as such

i now know that i dont want the impression of change to occur or bend with me in sight

if the change occurs naturally and becomes misaligned with the intentional goals sought out by both mates then it was never meant to be

if there is insight proven for a need of change then it was never meant to be

if your vocabulary/communication obstructs the truth or you can never be sure of the exact meaning put into context ...or if you are in the same book but cant find the same page...or if you are in the library at the same time but cant find the same book...trouble lurks ahead

if your goals (short and long term) dont align, then whats the point?

if you are looking for a relationship the right one will not occur, if you are not searching for a relationship it seems as though 'when it rains it pours'

then there is the term of isolation which is meant for nourishment of your soul, use this time wisely, although lonely it is time for discovery and allowment for search, growth, healing and rebirth

News! (Update)

I'm keeping my fingers cross :) I am hoping for some good news today! If it doesnt happen life must go on. I should know by this afternoon if its good news I will share with you all this week maybe :) If it's bad I need to pounder if I will share it.

P.S.
Apparently my post are'nt updating in the area of blogs your following. I haven't figured out why yet. If anyone finds out let me know plz, Thank you!

Update: Sorry, there is no good news to report or bad. It was just news!!

Sad 4th The Player

1973-2009

Another good person lost their life. So much death within the last month from actor/actress/musician/sportsmen and lets not forget the soldier's who passed today also. If you know me then you know I am a big Titans Fan (not stalker type) but I love my Titans as I mention earlier I love sports. My thoughts go out to his wife and sons and he was truly a nice guy. I was privilege to meet him once. We called him the Music City Miracle. These are photos I took at the last game the Titans played in Denver.

Watch this Pass!

Coin Toss!

By the way I had club seats the only down side was being in the club house surrounded by mostly Bronco fans he he..., nice view eh! :) I am in some of the photos I took or had others take even with players due to my connections :) but I can't post them I must remain anonymous!

Happy 4th The Game

Serena does it again! She is #1 among the ladies winning Wimbledon, Australian Open, and US Open . I love it when the lil sister kicks the big sister butt he he..anyway I played tennis in high school. I enjoy watching it and I say the game was good what can I say I'm a sports person. Not to mention she has nice legs. My legs use to look like that! I like my legs now but hers look better.